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Just die already...

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  • Just die already...

    *a letter arrives to the town of Navil, via the raven familiar of the lovely wizardess Esmee*

    My dear friends and loved ones,

    I believe a conversation I heard in a tavern explains recent events quite well. Word to the wise: never try to carry on a conversation with a man surrounded by over a dozen empty ale steins that he has stacked into a crude pyramid shape.

    "Very crafty that Kurz the Vile is, leader of the Aquor Cartel." claimed the man in green. "To have escaped death so many times."
    "Did you ever stop to think that perhaps it was never the real Kurz the Vile that was killed all those times?" asked the man in blue.
    "Using doubles to allude attackers?" the man in green reacted in shock. "No self-respecting smuggler would rely upon such cheap tricks."

    "How do you explain all the fingers brought back with his signus ring? There were at least 15."
    "Cheap goblin labor for the rings and half-troll blood for the fingers."

    "What about the time his head was brought back?"
    "Er...He had a second head hidden underneath his shirt. And as long as one lives, he lives."

    "What about the time his head was brought back a second time?"
    "Third hidden head."

    "What about the time he fell off the mountain?"
    "A really fat henchman broke his fall."

    "What about the time he was left in a fire and practically burned to ash?"
    "Note the word 'practically'."

    At this point, it was obvious to the man in blue that continuing the conversation further was pointless.

    Love,
    Osclow
    sigpic
    Osclow Wiltenholm- "I have seen behind the mask and almost miss the bliss of ignorance."
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