A Halfling's Meditations

[Rugabug]

A waterfall..

A dragonfly on the water...

The fish beneath it.

Roim stands in the water, pawing at the fish from beneath his reflect, his real reflection, meditating on the natural ways. A question has been palguing him since his escape a year ago, the answer just out of reach. His dreams and nightmares, the faces of his fellow slaves, the face of his mentor, all calling out to him for whatever reason, whether that is for freedom or healing or conversation.

"What does it mean to be a grove, Ursa. To have tranquility and Joy and Alertness. Wrath. Grace. Strength. Is this what I want? Is this the place I've saught? Then what are these dreams that plague me, sleep or consciousness, when I am here. I see them, I see them all. Our old brothers, they call to me from the horror of that wicked place of metal and stone. Their lives have surely been taken and for what. The things I wanted most in life have slipped from between my fingers, like the sand on the arena floor."

A name is called. It sounds so distant yet so familiar. Roim the bear pauses his fishing and looks about the grove at the keeper and the aspects that live there. He looks at the other druids, Annie, Deli. Roim looks at them all. It was none of these. Roim tries to make sense of what he heard, the words sounding orcish and yet not. Is it my old mentor calling to me from beyond time, beyong distance, wind and stone? Or is it something else. Roim goes back to his fishing as his vision blurs, his wild shape fading to pain as it returns to the weakness of his fragile self.

"Is it that I have things that I need, things fragile that need protecting? Is it because of the strength of the grove that I walk the paths of the bear Ursa? Perhaps I should ask the keeper what it means to be the bear. I need strength, but I need wisdom first."

Roim turns and walks out of the shallows of the pond, returning to the center of the grove. Looking at the Keeper, he seems busy somewhere else. Perhaps later.

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Any dms care to speak for teh Keeper?

[Rugabug]

The cold...

Cool liquid seeping into fur...

The smell of two worlds meeting in life changing explosions...

Roim standing knee deep in the pond again, wondering another thing.
Why is it the path of the bear is the path he was set on. It a simple thing to Roim to call upon nature directly and stay behind his protective companion, but times like this causes Roim to wonder which way his trail will turn. The elation of cool water ringing around his powerful legs. The explosion of water droplets spattering on his face and fur. The achievement he feels upon catching a fish. Roim pauses to look back at Ursa, his long time friend and guardian. Roim was always small and frail. The arena, the jeering, the beatings all made him tougher but only in spirit and wit. He was only made stronger in the face of sheer horror. Roim has always understood that violence was never the thing for him. Prefering to sit and fish, Roim is far from loving battle. Of course, he had to learn to lose himself to the rage deep within, long before he met Ursa. Fear can cause a man to do terrible things but no matter how much he tries to forget, he will always remember them. The men he killed out of fear of being killed. The friends he left behind when he heard the guards, the fear of captivity.

Roim speaks to Ursa in the growling tongue of the bear "Is this why, Ursa? Why I follow this path? Is it fear of death, fear of captivity, fear of becoming nothing that makes me strong? Is fear the destiny life has planned for me?"

Ursa only huffs and yawns, never really having the understanding or patience for speaking. Roim has always spoken to him but not as much to speak to the bear but rather to pose questiions for himself. Roim thinks to himself "Perhaps this is anoter question for the Keeper if he will have me for a student."

Roim returns his attention to the cool water and the smell of fresh fish, the smell of fresh blood.

[Rugabug]

Blood...

Fresh blood, accompanied by a stickiness between the fingers...

Roim ponders the days events. The Keeper turned down Roim's request but guided him to another teach, Master Karthus. A strange individual Karthus is, he exudes an aura of power but seems broken from having taken the wrong path. Roim thinks to himself "This one will definitly make a good teacher. He has great wisdom, wisdom paid for in pain and suffering." Roim tears off a strip of meat from the carcass. What did it mean to be a bear. Roim understood before he spoke his question that a bear is more than flesh and blood, but he never gave it much thought seeing he never considered it a solution to his current problem. His currently problem, not the things of the past or things of the future. Immediacy, the present. What was keeping Roim from understanding the path ahead was not pondering the path at present because he was always looking at the path behind. Even now, the faces of old memories show themselves. Roim tries to concentrate and push them to the side for the moment and begins to think about what it meant to be the bear. "Obviously,"Roim thought," One aspect of the bear is sheer power. Is this the end though? Of course it isnt but what does this in itself then mean? All aspects of the same thing are all interconnected with themselves within that thing because it is the grouping of these aspects that make the thing what it is. So, I must ask myself 'What does it mean to be powerful?' To be powerful is to have the ability to affect change, a dangerous thing to balance, but nature finds it necessary to give power to individuals. Why, so that the balance can be maintained should something not of nature come and disturb it. So, in the end the bear is the power to both kill and protect, to guard the balance." Roim continues to eat, both appluasing himself and berating himself for having answered the question but after so much time. However, how does this have anything to do with Roim. Roim has nothing needing protection, so then why does nature give him this power. "Perhaps then, in order to answer the next question he asks, I need to find something worthy of protection" Roim says alloud in the tongue of bears. With this, Roim finishes feasting and saunters off to look for Ursa.