A letter of complaint sent by a noblewoman to the Legion

[Chipmunk]

~~~
A letter, written on expensive stationary, with a dash of perfume sprinkled over the page, is delivered to the Legion.
~~~

Lectori Salutem,

Myself and my family has always been exceptionally grateful for all the Legion's efforts in protecting the region. Indeed, we all-too-often see a funeral procession going through the streets with yet another dead young man or woman who died valorously defending our city.

We are grateful, and we have never been shy to express this gratitude in glittering coin. Over the years, we've been honored to have been donating to our troops, honored to contribute in our own, small fashion.

Until today, when I found myself shoulder-to-shoulder with what could only be described as a beggar. Knowing all-too-well that many of these are pickpockets, I told the wretch to keep her distance. You would imagine my surprise when the wretch began talking back in terms I won't repeat here.

The matter escalated so greatly that a Knight had to step in. While in the beginning the knight attempted to calm the situation, even this knight had soon had it with the behavior of this woman. This woman, who proudly showed an insignia that she belonged to the Legion!

She was summarily dismissed by the knight, and ordered to return to her barracks.

It is my assumption this woman, who identified herself as Sile, will be dealt with appropriately. She does this city a disservice, and brings shame to the glorious colors of the Legion we all love. This is not a Legion I intend to support with further donations.

Signed,

~Amélie Diteglia,
House Diteglia ~

[FoogooFish]

Now that she has returned from her rotation in the field, Centurio Emiliana Blackwell finds herself being handed the complaint letter. After the obligatory eyeroll, Emiliana pens a reply - sans any perfume or elaborate decoration - and then personally delivers it to the noble estate for its intended recipient.

__________________________________________________ _____

Honored Lady Diteglia,

It pains me to hear that you were mistreated and offended by a Legionnaire. Our purpose and duty has always been to keep the Valley and her citizens safe and protected, and we are grateful for the respect and support that have been shown to us by the people in return.

Unfortunately, with the persistent and ever-increasing threat posed by the Bloodmaim and the constant level of high-alert that our soldiers maintain, it is entirely feasible that someone not suited to our standards has managed to slip into our ranks. You have my personal assurance that the matter will be investigated, and the Legionnaire will be appropriately disciplined. I will not tolerate such behavior from a soldier.

It is my sincere hope that the handling of this matter to your satisfaction will prompt your generosity once again. The actions of one Legionnaire are not representative of our demeanor as a whole, and the men and women still fighting in the field truly rely upon the considerations of those such as yourself and your family to continue their hard work.

Please do not hesitate to contact me should you require anything else.

Respectfully, and for the Legion,

Centurio Emiliana Blackwell
Fourth Legion

[Chipmunk]

In a large mansion in the city of Sundren, a noblewoman sat down with a sheet of her finest parchment - family crest and all - to write her response. Thinking how best to put to words all her thoughts she sprinkled the paper with some of the finest rose petals, before spraying it with some of her perfume.

She adjusted the fine scarf at her neck, and glanced out the window where her guards were just scaring off some urchins risking her rose garden with their play. Finally, the words came to her, and the quill started scritching over the paper.

Esteemed Centurio Blackwell,

It is most noble of you not to simply brush this matter aside, but to step up to the proverbial plate and admit that the Legion's standards cannot always be maintained. That was very big of you, and for that, you have my commendation.

My family and myself find ourselves moved by your plight, and we have decided to dedicate one cartload of silk to the outfitting of our valiant soldiers at the front lines.

We are furthermore looking forward to the public lashing of this rapscallion. The children have already begun constructing effigies.

Would you be so kind as to communicate the date of this event, so that we may ensure our busy schedules can accommodate?

Thank you very much, and we hope to hear from you soon,

~Amélie Diteglia,
House Diteglia ~

[FoogooFish]

The Legionnaire inwardly groans as she reads the missive from Lady Diteglia. "...nobles..." she mutters in the privacy of her own suite before once again crafting a politically diplomatic response.
_________________________________________

Honored Lady Diteglia,

You will be pleased to know that the Legion has someone in custody matching the description of the woman who earned your ire. She is presently confined, and once she is fit for questioning, a suitable punishment will be administered after the severity of her actions has been fully determined. Should a public display be deemed necessary by my superiors, I will personally ensure that you and your family are notified with haste.

On behalf of the Legion forces, I graciously thank you and House Diteglia for your generous gift to our soldiers. The continued support of the people bolsters our morale, and increased confidence is something that we all need in these trying times.

I am glad that I could aid you. Again, please do not hesitate to contact me should you require anything else.

Respectfully, and for the Legion,

Centurio Emiliana Blackwell
Fourth Legion

[Chipmunk]

The noblewoman set down her basket of freshly-clipped roses and wiped her forehead. She'd spent the last ten minutes slaving away in the garden, and she was starting to feel the heat of the sun. Lucky for her, her personal manservant and masseur Julius approached her. She delighted for a moment in the bulge of the man's bicep under his shirt, adjusted her cleavage suitably, and greeted him.

When he handed her Emiliana's letter she read it, selected a few roses and went inside. A generous handful of rose petals went into the envelope the letter was to be sent in, and a she dripped a few drops of strong-smelling perfume on the page.

Dear Centurio Blackwell,

A moment ago, my servants informed me there has been an unfortunate incident with the wagon carrying the silk. Not to worry, our cartwright is looking into the matter right now, but I cannot provide you with a date when it will be done. On the plus side, the wagon has additionally been loaded with a spare box of medical supplies we had in one of our warehouses, to the sum-total of 2500 bandages. Unfortunately, as I said, the cart is broken. Perhaps a public display of some sort might raise the morale of the cartwright, and add to the speed of his work?

On a seperate note: I believe a lashing to be in order for this woman, and certainly, the many years I've had to study law under private tutors must count for something.

Cordially,
~Amélie Diteglia,
House Diteglia ~

[FoogooFish]

Another eyeroll results after Emiliana reads the latest correspondence from the noblewoman. The Legionnaire then mulls the situation for a time, reviews some Sundren laws, particularly the ones regarding public humiliation, and finally writes a reply.
_____________________________________

Honored Lady Diteglia,

I regret the delay in bringing a resolution to this matter, but our captive seems to have some sort of alcohol-related sickness and is unfit for thorough questioning at this time.

Given the nature of her acts, public humiliation certainly seems like an apt choice for punishment, and I commend your thoughtfulness in making the suggestion. Once the disgraced woman is deemed fit to face the consequences, I will ensure that appropriate seating is provided for you and any other members of your family that wish to be present.

Respectfully, and for the Legion,

Centurio Emiliana Blackwell
Fourth Legion

(( OOC Note: the player of Sile is Euro-based and is offline by the time I get off work. We briefly spoke this morning, but the resolution will have to take place sometime this weekend so our play schedules coincide. ))

[Chipmunk]

A noblewoman, who was just busy getting fitted for a dress in the latest fashion, receives the letter. She curses at the tailor who 'clearly got the measurements wrong anyway - she is clearly a size smaller than the tailor thinks, fires her then heads to her study to compose her reply.

Dearest Centurio Blackwell,

Good news! The issue with the cart proved to be a mere broken axle. It's been sent en-route and is scheduled to be delivered this afternoon.

Additionally, I have received word that our government's buildings are awfully drab on the inside. Having heard that you make for an inspirational person in our city, I will send my personal painter over to your house, so a painting of your visage may come to grace the halls of a government building.

Cordially,
~Amélie Diteglia,
House Diteglia ~

[FoogooFish]

The Legionnaire quickly composes a letter and has it sent to the Diteglia estate.
__________________________________________________ ____________________

Honored Lady Diteglia,

I was finally able to question the Legionnaire. Her conduct, quite frankly, was atrocious, and I hope it will please you to learn that she will be dishonorably discharged from the Legion following her public punishment of three lashes. I have also ordered her to issue a written apology to those whom have been harmed by her disrespectful actions.

The time and location of the lashing is [insert relevant information here.] Appropriate seating will be provided for you and your family.

While I regret that our correspondence resulted from the misdeeds of one of my soldiers, I am glad that the matter has been finally resolved. Your generous gifts mean a lot to the Legion, and we soldiers appreciate the continued support of House Diteglia despite this unfortunate incident. If ever I can be of further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Respectfully, and for the Legion,

Centurio Emiliana Blackwell
Fourth Legion

[Chipmunk]

A noblewoman was just in the process of taking a hot steam bath, in a tub perpetually re-filled by a few servants, when her handmaiden finds her with a letter. "Fetch writing utensils" she immediately orders, then dictates her letter to the handmaiden, seeing as how her own hands are wet.

Centurio Blackwell,

Thank you for informing me. I have requested our family's wizards to begin construction of a scrying pool large enough for our entire family to sit around, so that we may observe the spectacle from the comforts of our own home.

On that note, I wish to cordially invite you for afternoon tea at our estate. My eldest son, Pierre, has recently returned from his boarding school, and I believe it would be good for his development to meet a woman of your stature.

You are expected at [insert time].

Warm regards,

~Amélie Diteglia,
House Diteglia ~

[FoogooFish]

Upon receiving the reply from the noblewoman, Emiliana runs a bare hand over her face and grooooaaaans.
______________________________


"...not again...!"

[Chipmunk]

The noble Centurio receives a luscious bouquet of roses, tied together with a thin band of the finest of silks. There is no card.

[caterpillar]

Letter from Sile

Sile sat slowly down and after a minute of serious pondering wrote two identical letters, one has been sent to the house of Lady Amélie Diteglia of the House Diteglia, the second one, a bit postponed, to the hands of Centurio Emilianna Blackwell with the attached note: With love, Sile.

Dear Lady Amélie Diteglia of House Diteglia,

I wrote you this letter on behalf of Centurio Emilianna Blackwell, who persisted on me to do so. I had happily obliged!

So here we are. Ready?

Well, screw you! I curse you! I curse the ugly spoiled brats of yours! I curse your husband, your cat and all the rest of bastards from your family! I hope you all die as soon as possible, as slowly as possible and as painfully as possible, especially YOU, you lausy little bitch! Please, break your neck and burn in hell!

Finally! I was not going to write this, but like I said Centurio Blackwell had demanded. Say her hello from me.

Sincerely yours Sile the Greatest of house Sile.

PS: Your husband is really not as good as a lover, as he tends to claim.

[FoogooFish]

(( I want to note that I am glad I had my office door closed when I read this post at work, because I seriously laughed out loud. ))

When the 'apology' letter finally arrives, Emiliana reads and then re-reads it. Her eyelids flutter closed, and a heavy, groaned sigh escapes her lips. Once the moment of frustration has passed, the Legionnaire quickly composes a letter to Lady Diteglia.
__________________________________

Honored Lady Diteglia,

It would seem as if my leniency with former Legionnaire Sile was unappreciated, as she sent me a copy of the 'apology' letter she undoubtedly wrote to you as well. My orders to her were specific: I had to approve her missive before I had it delivered to your estate. Needless to say, her willful disobedience in complying with such a simple order proves her unworthiness and, to be quite frank, blatant stupidity.

Should she fail to appear at her scheduled lashing, please be reassured that she will be deemed an enemy of the State and offered no reprieve. As it stands, she will receive additional charges (and thus lashes) for her continued unacceptable behavior.

Please accept my sincere apologies for the insult delivered to your noble family.

Respectfully, and for the Legion,

Centurio Emiliana Blackwell
Fourth Legion