Thoughts of a Confused Priestess

[Anrilor]

as i lay here in the bath house contemplating my life and the convictions of everyone I hold dear. I find myself at a lonely spot between two parallel paths.

One wishes my former lover dead, and its gaining more and more followers by the passing day. I do not wish this as I still find myself loving him, despite everything he has done to me, and his actions with the red haired vampiress. It would seem Evananda was right, men are too easily swayed by the unobtainable and forbidden. But i still love him, i could never reach out with malice against him. It is against my goddess to destroy beauty and love, but how can I stop him from loving the very thing that seeks to destroy me without breaking his heart?

on the other path, the few who do support my love in consoling and loving a vampire to turn it to our side and seek its cure back to mortality is slightly disturbing. mainly because she does not wish to turn back from her faith. what she is, is what my love is to Sune. to try and turn her would be impossible, and I cannot understand what hope my love sees in trying to change her.

and then there is me, the lone woman defending the man she loves from certain death, all the while trying to stop him from doing something he already regrets in the name of friendship and love. I try to appease both sides, but in the end one of them will force me to choose a side that I cannot choose. after all, if my love and the vampiress truly love each other, as a Priestess of Sune, can i truly kill the vampiress as an abomination and destroy the bond of love I am sworn to protect?

I have no answers for these questions and such is why I too fear for my life.

[Anrilor]

things are coming to a end, I have to make a choice or people will begin to fight and die. I myself have been informed that there will soon be a warrant out for my arrest for treason and I too now face death. They place a warrant on myself in order to get at the man I love.

There is a small light at the end of all this. I have been told of the gift to bring about the vampiress's redemption should she accept it fully in her heart. I can only pray that her love for the man I have tried so hard to protect over the last months is strong enough to save us all and turn from her deity of blood lust. If not, then we all will parish in the next days.

[Anrilor]

*laying upon a bench in the Sunite temple Ami closes her eyes and thinks about past events*

What have I done to have the people I love turn on me? have I not done the right things? It would seem that everything has to be a secret, even things I am not used to being secrets. I've discussed love openly that were supposed to be secrets, I've told secrets to those that I shouldn't have only to progress actions in hopes that good will happen from them. Have I been wrong in all these actions? Have I truely been manipulative in my ways with people's trust to get done what I thought needed to be done? I don't know, I just thought I always did what was right.

[Anrilor]

The red headed priestess turns and thrashes in her bed. Her body drips in sweat from the nightmare she apparently is having. She has kicked the blankets off in a fit of terror in her dreams. Images of her temple in ruins, black starless skies, desecration and death, and the image most troubling is that of a black gauntlet strangling the life out of Sune as the pool of Evergold turns black with the shadowy figures taint destroying its golden sheen. After a while she wakes with a start, drawing in a sharp deep breath and lets it out slowly. she wipes her face of the sweat, her hair in a tangled wet mess that sticks to her face.

"It was just a dream," she utters, "just a bad dream."

She slowly moves out of the bed, her footsteps quiet in the night as she moves to the door, unable to shake the depressing and worrying images out of her head. Her nightgown clings tightly to her damp body. She makes her way down the hall to the wash room of her inn, with nothing but a low lit candle guiding her way. The door creeks as she carefully closes it behind her, and then makes her way over to the wash bucket and fills it with some cool water. She takes a sponge getting it wet and begins wiping down her face trying to relax and calm down. The feeling slowly subsides with her gentle caring and cool water on her face, but she couldn't shake the feeling of a cold being with harsh and evil eyes watching her for the time. After the feeling faded, the feeling of being watched also dissipated. Something was wrong, someone was trying to get into her mind and destroy her, but she would prove to be stronger than that.