Grammar Drill Sergeant

[TheBlankStare]

Toe the line, you worms! We've got a serious problem in our little community today and I'm here to correct it so listen up! Anyone who doesn't gets extra PT when I'm done!

Too many of you little elven tree huggers have been getting confused about the difference between two easy little words and that's not acceptable! I'm going to make it easy on you and provide some examples so even soldiers with brains the size of little birdies can understand it. Got me?!

Good! The two little words are "to" and "too" and I'm not talking about the number, maggots!

"To," that's the one with one "o" in it for you ladies who were listening, is probably the one you'll use most often. You'll use it mostly as part of infinitive verb phrases like "to salute" or "to shout," got it?! But this little baby has some tricks up her skirt that I don't even want you thinking about, pinheads! It's also a preposition that some of you have probably used correctly once or twice. "Let's go to the mess for some chow," is a great example of the proper use of this two letter word!

Now you ladies probably think you've got it all figured out now and are feeling pretty good about yourselves, aren't you? Well I'm not done yet! We've got one more word to discuss and that's "too" with two of those little O's in it!

"Too" is an adverb people! It can mean "also" or "excessively." Like when I say that if you don't pay attention, screwball, you'll be doing your PT and PT with the other platoon, too! I don't care if you think it's too much PT!

Now if I see any of you misusing these two little words I'll be cutting your rations in half! Those of you who think that's too harsh better step forward and head off to the mess hall and talk to Cookie who's got a whole pile of potatoes to peel!

Dismissed!

[Phantom Lamb]

Thank's very much! This was much more helpful than Machs grammar post.

[Deathevn]

Yes sir lamb sir! I will speek goodr englisch TOO!

[Kaseira]

To clever.

[Dayledose]

Informative, I will usually let it slide if I don't think someone uses english as their primary language. It does kill me to see "Too" for everything though. *cough, Subal, cough*

[DM_Equinox]

Actually, foreign speakers tend to get these things pounded into them more thoroughly than the natives, I've noticed

F u cn rd ths u cnt spl wrth a dm
Eqinox - Defender of the "its"

[Jai_V]

Let us also talk about the difference between "lose" and "loose."

"Lose" is to have something taken away or misplaced.
"Loose" is what your mother's legs were, one night, in order for you to be here.

[Product of Void]

I spell
you smell
we all sell

just git r done :P

[Subal]

hey hey hey ! leave my horrible spelling alone damn it !

i do pretty good ..sometimes!~